Wednesday, May 2, 2018

Why I’ll give myself a deadline…but not an expiration date.

Hey guys,

One of the things that keeps me always striving to accomplish my goals is my habit of setting deadlines. Setting a due date for myself gives me the structure I need to push myself forward. It puts me in a “no excuses” mindset to GET. THINGS. DONE.

Plus the feeling of making a to-do list and then getting to check the items off as I go is one of the most satisfying feelings in the world! I mean, right!?

I’ve been goal planning since I was a kid. I had big dreams and I wasn’t going to let anyone or anything stop me from making them happen! I knew I wanted to have an impact on the world. I knew I wanted to be a fashion designer. I knew that one day I’d be the CEO of my own company.  
The crazy thing is…because I never gave up, those things are happening RIGHT NOW. I kept trying. I kept pushing. I kept setting goals and CRUSHING THEM. And I am so grateful every single day that I get to live my dream.

However, of course, there are things I wanted so bad that never happened. Things that I “expired” out of.

Growing up, one of my biggest dreams was to be named Top 25 Under 25 by one of those business magazines – like Forbes. Inc., or Entrepreneur. As I crept closer and closer to 25, I felt more pressure (from within) to hurry up and start making a name for myself! I applied every year that they opened up applications. But I never heard back from any of the editors. 

When I turned 25, I felt like I had done something wrong. Like I was a failure. Like I was too old and too unsuccessful. I started doubting myself. Like, was anything I had accomplished thus far even any any good? Sigh.

Do you see the problem here? I was letting someone else tell me what the definition of success was supposed to looked like. I was letting a publication who didn’t even know me dictate the definition of everything I wanted to be. I was letting a stranger control my happiness and my “shelf life”. And you know what? That’s absolutely absurd! 

BECAUSE WHO CARES.

If you’re feeling any pressure right now to be someone or do something by a certain age, I urge you to stop feeling like you’re going to run out of time. You’ve gotta watch “The Expiry Date” by SKII. It’s all the feels.



This video illustrates the intense pressure for Asian women to get married by the age of 30. If you don’t have a husband by then, you’re considered too old, unwanted, and no good. And the worst part is, just by being born a girl, you’re ALREADY considered a burden to your family. In the Asian culture, boys are typically seen as more valuable than girls.

Luckily for me, my parents did not pressure me to get married by a certain age. BUT they did intensely pressure and scare me into a career path I did not want for myself. In both cases, the parents are trying to secure financial stability for their children. Now that I am older, I see their intention. However, that doesn’t make the shaming and the judging okay. Not by our parents and definitely not by society. I loved Chloe Bennet’s interview talking about the topic.

You’re never too young, too old, or too ANYTHING to do ANYTHING! I want you to keep being you regardless of what other people think. Not to be morbid, but I suppose the only expiration date we have is the one that is engraved into our tombstone. But even then, you can still leave a forever impact on this world if you live positively, passionately, and choose to serve others.

Love, 
Cassey

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